Scary Dreams

Why is it that you never sleep well when you know you have to wake up early the next day? I started waking up around 4AM this morning and would go between sleep and consciousness every 15 minutes or so. I was able to get up and go through the day WITH NO CAFFEINE. I’ll mark that as a win in my book. I hope I can do the same tomorrow!

I’ve been thinking a lot about weddings lately, since my summer is chockful of them and I will be attending one this weekend. It’s such an exciting time for the couple, getting to be celebrated in their choices to spend a forever with another individual and I’m excited for that next chapter in all my friends’ lives! Heck, I’ve been dreaming of my own wedding since I was little! Instead of counting sheep, I would plan wedding details (I’m not kidding, it helped me fall asleep because there are so many details you need to account for)! I guess I’ve always been a planner 🙂

Even so, I’m probably more excited for my marriage and being able to share my life with someone I care so deeply about. Someone to stand by me to fulfill my hopes and dreams while at the same time helping them fulfill theirs and seeing the joy that brings them. That being said, I am honestly a little scared to start that new chapter. It’s something that (mostly) everyone goes through so I know I will make it through, but there is so much change involved. It means saying goodbye to sleepovers with my best friends and driving around late at night to clear my head. It means that someone will always be there to know that I’m watching The Bachelorette premiere for a 3rd time (no comment) or see my horrific bed head in the morning and still love me anyways. My friend has been counting down the days until her wedding on instagram for the past few days and today I think she hit the nail on the head:

We would like to ask if you would pray right now over our upcoming wedding, and more importantly our marriage. It is a wonderful and yet challenging undertaking, and we truly believe in the power of prayer to help guide us through it. Thank you so much in advance!

I feel that people get so wrapped up in crossing huge life milestones off their to-do list that they forget what comes next. Yes, I graduated. Oh wait, I have to find a job? I got married, you mean I have to live with this person even when they have smelly poops? I just had a baby and can’t wait to have cute newborn photos taken, what do you mean this living thing is going to be dependent on me for 18+ years? Planning a wedding is just one huge checklist with the end goal of a marriage and you want your friends and family to look to you and say “Wow, I want a marriage like that.” At least, that’s what I’m looking for.

1. >5,000 steps (started 5/11): 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 11 12 13 14 15 16 17 18 19 20 21
2. Blog posts (started 5/14): 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 11 12 13 14 15 16 17 18 19 20 21
3. 5:30AM (starting 5/19): 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 11 12 13 14 15 16 17 18 19 20 21

UPDATE: For some reason, wordpress is thinking I posted this on May 20th. NOT SO. Definitely got it in at 10:30PM on May 19th.

Scary Dreams

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